No Safe Place

Okay so I was going to write about the events of this weekend, but as I was logging in, a story came on the television that I can't ignore.
As Lessley probably knows by now, a kid warming up for baseball game on Saturday at Canal Little League fields was touched inappropriately.
Now this may not seem that out of place to most people but I used to live right next to those fields and it just so happens that I was there on Saturday.
And before anybody gets the idea to make a stupid joke, the guy was between 28-38 and driving a big pickup truck with lettering on the side. Anyone who knows me knows that I drive a tiny mini cooper and I have no side burns.
But back to the point, I have two issues with this, A) is no place safe & B) where were the parents.
A) I lived literally next door to those fields not two years ago and I have known for years that that is far from a safe place. I had people try to mug me twice while I was walking through there to or from People's Plaza, I saw countless people with prostitutes in cars, condoms and needles strewn across the ground, drug dealers doing business, and even discovered a car being torched after being involved in a murder once. Why is it that in the five years that I lived there and the two years since, no one figured out that there was a problem. I know that it can be hard to help these things but how hard could it be to have a cop or people's plaza security officer do a drive through once an hour or so. Peoples plaza bought or is in the process of buying it last i heard so they should be willing to help. Don't you think some kind of authority presence would deter incidences like this.
B)Now it doesn't take a genius to figure out that you wouldn't drop your kid off at an inner city park for a few hours so why would you do it at a park that is just as bad because it was in the suburbs. The kids are obviously safe when parents or coaches are around but its not the kind of place I would like to be alone and I'm fairly capable of taking care of myself.
Anyway, I just think that his is a terrible thing that shouldn't have happened, and I'm extra concerned because I grew up around those fields.

Happy Earth Day!

Would you look at that? It's Earth Day! And I thought that there was no better way to celebrate than to bombard you with my 100% organic thoughts about global warming, war, and the idiocy of the American population.

1. I've decided that I am going to start recycling. I never did before, mainly because I thought it would take too much time and effort. But after driving by a landfill on the way home from the King of Prussia mall, and smelling the delightful odor that accompanied it, I decided that I need to do my share to help out Mr. Earth. And you should too! Start by recycling all of your Red Bull cans (Ross...).
2. I'm in a serious mood to go to some kind of protest or march or picket or something. If anyone knows of some kind of organized protest that I attend, let me know. Because in today's world, there's a whole lot of complaining going on, but no one seems to want to do anything about it. I want to do something about it. Stupid people bitching about the war: "Blah blah blah President Bush sucks, I don't know why I think that, but he does, and I'm now going to show my patriotism by sitting on my lazy American ass and doing nothing." Come on people, if you don't like it, do something about it! Many people complain about the government, but don't vote. I bet more young people vote for American Idol than for government officials. More people take time out of their day to vote for Sanjaya Malakar than to actively participate in democracy. And that's stupid.
3. WHY DO PEOPLE DENY GLOBAL WARMING??? It's happening. Face it. Stop Global Warming. Buy a bracelet. Also, check out Simple Shoes, they're made with natural products! I think I'm going to get myself some of these.

Okay, that's all for now. And happy Earth Day.

A Video To Save The World

So anybody who knows me knows that I got completely sucked into the whole Invisible Children hype, hence the banner on the right, but it never really occurred to me how completely it could change someones view of life.
So I finally got a copy of the video from Anna last week after the showing in the auditorium and watched it again in its entirety. BTW, for those getting tire of focusing entirely on IC, watch the video again and you will understand. Anyway, they give you two copies of the video so that you can share it with those who don't know, that's exactly what I did.
I loaned it to Hilton, my friend from work, yesterday and he watched it after I left. Today when I saw him at work, both he and his girlfriend were pretty pissed at me.
They weren't mad that I made them watch it, they were mad that I hadn't showed them sooner. They actually apologised for any complaining they do about their lives, it is hard to complain when you compare your life to that of the IC. (Don't worry, I'm not going to stop complaining, then you wouldn't have anything to read.)
Anyway, after watching it once, Hilton wants to have a showing in the Smyrna opera house to help raise money. I have been toying with the idea for a while but I need a Smyrna contact our age to get people to actually show up.
He also wants to go to Displace Me, but since I'm already off, he has to cover the shift.
And before anyone asks, he's constantly broke so he can't donate any money. He still owes me sixty bucks.
So yeah, that video can change the world. If you want to borrow it, let me know, I'd be more than happy to share.

CAREBEARSTARE

In response to Ross's thoughts about superheroes, I must voice my personal opinion on the matter. I previously thought that Violet Parr from the Incredibles, with the power of invisibility, would be my choice (see comment on previous post). But, after much deliberation between myself and... myself... I came to the conclusion that I would rather have...

THE CAREBEARSTARE!

You have no idea how long it took to format that font. Visit xkcd.com. And, since I can't just share the excitement of pictures without deep thought to follow, I was wondering: why does society insist upon the institution of heroes? Why do humans, especially Americans, present very strong men in Spandex with bizarre powers, usually in gangs (e.g. X-Men, Fantastic Four), as being figures that we should look up to? I don't understand. It is fun to watch television shows that chronicle the adventures of these people, but why can't people just be the way that they want to be? We need the creations of Hollywood to make us say, "Wow, I want to be that"? I suppose it isn't so much a question of why we have them, as why they are the way they are. Another key feature of the "hero", as defined by my former British literature teacher, is that they have some sort of childhood hardship. This means orphan, usually. Why so far-fetched? Why can't we have Suburban Single Mother Woman With Amazing Time Management Skills? I know I want time management skills.

If I Could Be A Super Hero...

Okay, so I've been a bit lazy lately, but I'm back.
As you may have noticed, the blog is now better than other.

So anyway, I was thinking today(I know, shocker), if I could be a super hero, which one would I be?
The Superman is awesome, but its so overplayed.
Aquaman is pretty cool too. I mean he can talk, and breath, under water, and talk to fish. I bet they could tell you some pretty crazy stuff. He never gets the respect he deserves.
Spiderman is alright, I mean it makes good movies, but the powers seem to come with entirely too much drama. Its the love story that no one would want to be in.
And nerds world wide would shed a tear if I didn't didn't mention the X-men. Just about any mutant above a class three would be worth having their powers, except for the toad. You have got to feel sorry for that guy.
Personally, the slightly lesser known normally challenged are my favorites. Painkiller Jane and Jake 2.0 are both really strong and heal insanely fast, but Jake gets his powers from nanites, so he can control technology too.
I'm still not to sure, but I think its between Gene from the X-men and Jake.

The world will end eventually.

I have proof of this! Visual proof! I took a photograph that I am overwhelmingly proud of. 'Tis suburban cookie-cutter America, with none other than the grand view of a factory in the background, polluting the air which we breathe. Surely there are small children frolicking in their yards, pets chewing toys, or a young couple enjoying a recently purchased home. A lush green field stretches across the land. But despite the beauty, this precious home of the human race is being destroyed. I bet Al Gore would love to get his hands on this picture!

...

Okay, probably not. Al Gore, despite his good intentions, really pisses me off. I mean, sure, it was noble of him to make Inconvenient Truth, and to spread the word of science to the ignorant deniers of truth. But for Christ's sake, we all know that a little part of Al Gore wanted to boost his political status at least a little bit. And this wouldn't bother me so much except for the fact that suddenly, Al Gore has become the spokesperson, or the mascot if you will, for global warming. Many of my Republican friends (bless their little hearts!) say things like, "It's El Niño, it's the natural way of things, and besides, Al Gore is stupid." Um, since when did politicians act as representations of ideas, of facts? Yes, Al Gore is stupid. I know. But the idea that global warming is destroying planet Earth and may put us in a neverending cycle of doom is SCIENCE. Perhaps my wording is a bit exaggerated. But anyway, politicians have nothing to do with it. I don't say things like, "God doesn't exist, that's just how it is, and besides, George Bush is stupid." No. I too would agree that George Bush is stupid, but I believe in Christianity because it seems (mostly) valid to me. You could also replace "George Bush" with "Pat Robertson". Perhaps this is a bad example, because it has nothing to do with factual information, but you get the idea. Bottom line: Make judgments on the actual issues, not based on the other people who support them.

Cáisc shona daoibh

Or happy Easter to those of you who have better things to do than translate an obscure language that most Irish people don't even speak anymore. Anyway, its been a couple of days since i have made an appearance so i thought I'd drop by for a quick rant.
So there's 1 and 1/2 days of freedom left until we have to return to the grueling 5:30 wake up calls and endless hours of homework and yet i already have homework, how is that possible?Why do they even bother to call it a break if we are just going to have to work on their assignments anyway?
I have much more pointless things to do with my time than school work.
If god intended me to write a paper on Easter Sunday, he wouldn't have planned it so spring break fell on Easter every year.
And for those out there that would say that this is a direct result of procrastination, You Are Wrong. My entire break has been pretty jam packed with all kinds of craziness. Friday, work. Saturday, packing. Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, & Wednesday; awesomest camping trip ever. Thursday, resting & starting this blog. Friday & Saturday, working. Sunday, mass, family ish, & paper. And tomorrow, the last day of freedom, isn't an option because i have plans.
So yeah, that's pretty much all I have to say. Boo homework.

"I snorted my father."

This is too special. Much too special to not comment on. From ABC News:

LONDON Apr 4, 2007 — Keith Richards has acknowledged consuming a raft of illegal substances in his time, but this may top them all. In comments published Tuesday, the 63-year-old Rolling Stones guitarist said he had snorted his father's ashes mixed with cocaine. "The strangest thing I've tried to snort? My father. I snorted my father," Richards was quoted as saying by British music magazine NME. "He was cremated and I couldn't resist grinding him up with a little bit of blow. My dad wouldn't have cared," he said. "… It went down pretty well, and I'm still alive." Richards' father, Bert, died in 2002, at 84.

All I know is that Keith Richards is going to have a fun time when he dies. I can see it now: "Heyyy God, so um, yea I don't know what happened there. I'm really sorry. It was a good idea at the time. Oh Dad! Hey! So remember that one time when I snorted you? Yeah, um... sorry. I didn't think you'd mind... you minded? Oops. You went down nice, for the record..."

Edit: So, it seems that Disney isn't too happy about this. Being that Keith Richards is playing Jack Sparrow's father in Pirates of the Caribbean 3, Disney has stated that Richards won't be doing much publicity for the film, considering his... er... cannabalistic habits. Now he's claiming that it was all a joke. Psh.

Thumb Wars To Save The World

Since this is my first post I should probably say hi too, so Hi.
Now that that's out of the way, I have the solution to all wars ever. For this explanation I'm going to use a hypothetical situation so try not to get confuzzled.
So say Canada got tired of people in the U.S. making fun of them for saying "aboot" so they were like "Stop making fun of us for saying 'aboot' or we will declare war on you're ass, we don't even see whats so funny aboot it." so America was like "Yo, F you, no one threatens us. Freedom of Speech bitches." Of course Canada is kind of a pussy so it hesitates for like two weeks, then declares war.
Both countries get their top people together and meet at Niagara Falls to battle it out.
Unlike most wars however, neither side brings an army, there are no air strikes, not a single gun. Just the best thumb wrestler from each nation. They duel for 72 rounds and who ever has the majority of the wins, wins the war.

For those who would wonder were i got the number 72, a few of you might have picked up on the fact that its the number of virgins that Islamic martyrs believe they will get in heaven. I thought it was appropriate considering the current political climate.

Back to the point...No death, no destruction, and no least popular president in history, just a clear U.S. victory. And yes the U.S. would win because well we have the best in everything, especially ridiculous obscure sports. It could be the end of wars as we know it.
And imagine what we could do with all the money we would save from not having to support an army.
If anyone has Bush's email address, send him the link to this site so he can end the war in Iraq. From what I can see, he doesn't have any better ideas.

Bienvenidos

Wow! This is so exciting! It's a blog! Our blog! Neato!
Welcome to Yelling About Life, from Lessley. I'm one of the contributors, and Ross is the other one. We plan to post as random of thoughts (that's all of them) as possible, so enjoy (or not, screw you). Leave a comment if you want (or not, screw you).
Hopefully we won't run out of things to say or think, that wouldn't be good. Let's hope neither of us goes comatose.
So speaking of comas, do you think that people have valid thoughts when in one of those? I mean, I have a hard time believing that humans are capable of being empty for that long of a period of time. But you've never heard anyone talk about coma dreams. "Yeah, so I was coma-ing the other day, and I had the weirdest dream. I was naked and everyone was looking at me..."
No. That never happens.
Maybe this question is well-known in the medical community, but I'm not a member, so I don't know. If I were in a comatose state, I myself would prefer to be able to dream. But then, when you woke up, wouldn't you think you were still in a dream, since you would have such a long time to conjure up some bizarre dream world to be in? My dream world would be like Super Mario, I think.
I love Super Mario, and I miss the days of NES. Blowing in those silly cartridges.
But anyway, welcome.

The Smiths - "Girlfriend In A Coma"